by Patriots Daily Kitchen Staff

This will be the final Patriots Daily Buffet Table as I’m retiring. Wait, I’m not. I’m not sure. Maybe. Maybe I’ll call Peter King for advice.

No that’s stupid, Peter King is an idiot. I’m definitely not not un-retiring, but maybe I’m not retiring in the first place.

I know, I’m not retiring but I will throw game winning beers to JetsDaily and then pretend I have tendinitis.

Tendinitis caused by just acting like a kid out there with the excessive text messaging and taking photos from odd positions.

What to Eat?

Halloween must be Favre’s favorite holiday. When else could a two-faced huckster who likes to pretend he’s a good ol’ boy feel more comfortable than when everyone else is wearing masks?

We’ll be making a Minnesota favorite. A burger with a surprise packed inside. Not to worry, unlike a text message from St. Brett this burger is only packed with cheese. Also unlike Brett, this burger won’t get any coaches fired.

It is called the Jucy Lucy, or some will say Juicy Lucy, and then they’ll argue about who made it first. Honestly who cares. Going by the recent history in Minnesota, I’m going to assume it was first made in Green Bay but then stolen by Minnesota.

We’ll avoid the spelling issue by renaming them.

St. Brett’s Sterger Burgers (serves 4)

  • 24 ounces ground beef, 80% fat
  • 8 slices American Cheese to be traditional
  • Seasoning/spices: salt and pepper, and it’s not traditional but a little onion powder, garlic powder or dry mustard is always a nice addition to burger meat

Mix the burger and seasoning and form into 8 equal patties of around 3 ounces each. You want these patties to be flatter and thinner than normal because you’ll be doubling them up.

Now lay out 4 of the burgers, and top each with 2 slices of the cheese. You may have to break the cheese into smaller pieces to make it fit. You don’t want it to hang over the sides of the burger. Keep the cheese a good 1/4″ inch from the sides.

Top with the other 4 burgers, and pinch around the sides to seal the 2 halves together.

Cooking is the same as with a regular burger. Over high heat. Cook 3 to 4 minutes, give a quarter turn, cook an  additional minute to 2, flip, cook 2 to 3 minutes, give a quarter turn, cook an additional minute or 2. Done.

The FDA recommends cooking for 6 minutes per side, but cooking for 4 to 5 on the first side, and then 3 to 4 on the second is going to make a juicier burger.

So it’s just a cheeseburger right? Not entirely, the cheese seems to block some of the heat from transferring through the burger, so you can get a nice char on the outside, but keep the middle so it doesn’t go past medium.

Also, the process lends itself to all sorts of ingredients. Especially those that can be hard to keep on top of a burger. For example, why not try one or more of jalapeno slices, cooked bacon, roasted red peppers, or crumbled blue  cheese.

It will be a surprise tucked inside, like a BrettFavre pick to end the game.

What to Drink?

In the spirit of Halloween we’ll go trick or treating. Macro beers dressed up pretending to be Craft.

If you’re a dedicated Bud, Miller, Coors drinker then think of these as treats. Easy gateway beers made by a favorite manufacturer.

If you’re a dedicated Bud, Miller, Coors hater, well you can think of these as tricks. That you’ll now know to avoid if you didn’t already know.

If you fall somewhere in the middle, these are beers you might recognize as the best available choices at restaurants, stadiums, airports and small liquor stores.

AB InBev puts most of theirs under the Michelob label with a few pushed out to their own labels.

There are a few solo projects:

Budweiser American Ale is the only one that falls under the Budweiser label. It’s a fairly good amber ale. If I was in a restaurant where the only choices were Bud/Miller/Coors Lite and Bud American Ale, it would be an easy choice.

Wild Blue Blueberry Lager is an odd 8% ABV blueberry beer. Like the bastard child of Four Loko and Purple Drank. I don’t know why anyone would drink this. It is likely popular amoung sportswriters who get together to watch Jersey Shore.

Organic Wild Hop Lager is the attempt to capitalize on the whole organic craze. Expect it to taste like most organic products, half the taste for twice the price.

Redbridge is a rider on the Gluten Free bandwagon. So yaay gluten free. Does ‘gluten’ mean ‘taste’? I think it might.

That brings us to the Michelob branded products. They’re not bad representatives of their respective styles.

There are probably about a dozen styles in total. These all run right around 5% ABV.

First the seasonals:
Jack’s Pumpkin Spice Ale is the fall seasonal, and it’s one of those pumpkin spiced amber ales that are all too common. Surprisingly it’s not as over the top as most.

Winter’s Bourbon Cask Ale is the winter seasonal, and it’s full of vanilla flavor. Lots and lots of vanilla flavor. If you like vanilla ice cream added to cream soda, and topped with vanilla icing, then covered with a vanilla fondant and then drizzled with a vanilla sauce you’d probably say Winter’s Bourbon Cask Ale is ok, but they need to cut down on the Vanilla.

Michelob Amber Bock is a sweet dark beer. Don’t expect a true Bock, the name here is a reference to the ‘Bock’ style most American mega brewers made up to the 1960’s.

Michelob Bavarian Style Wheat is a passable hefeweizen. Like most hefeweizens you’ll probably end up drinking this because they sneak it into every mix pack. See, just like the craft brewers!

Michelob Black & Tan, porter and lager … premixed?? Next thing you’ll be telling me cats and dogs can be friends. Unlike the doomed nature of a feline/canine truce, Michelob Black & Tan actually works.

Michelob Irish Red is a true Irish style Red Ale, and not a reddish lager with an “Oirish” name.

Michelob Marzen, better known as the Octoberfest style. A fairly malty lager, this is one of the best Michelob products.

Michelob Pale Ale it’s no Sierra Nevada Pale Ale or Deschutes Mirror Pond, but it’s a drinkable pale ale.

Michelob Porter darker and tastier than anything you’d expect Budweiser to make. I’m surprised their Belgian overlords haven’t ordered it’s termination.

Michelob Rye P.A. might be the best of the bunch. An American Style Pale Ale (hoppy) with Rye added. Rye adds a touch of spiciness.

Miller/Coors can be mostly found under the Blue Moon label (Coors) and Leinenkugel label (Miller).

First, the standalone:

Killian’s Oirish Red, made with commercials showing an Oirish bartender smashing someone’s watch. And “slow roasted caramelized malts”. It’s a lager, slightly fuller than the standard Coors product, and it is darker from the use of some crystal malt. Just don’t expect a real Irish Red Ale, or anything as good as the Michelob Irish Red. Yes there was a George Killian (Lett) but his family’s brewery was purchased and closed down about 60 years ago.

Now the Blue Moons: These all run within a few tenths of 5.5% ABV.

Blue Moon Belgian White is the standard product. It’s in the style of a Belgian White Beer. Made with wheat, orange peel and coriander. Blue Moon is now available in cans.

Harvest Moon Pumpkin Ale is the fall seasonal. It’s another pumpkin and spice beer. I liked the Jack’s Pumpkin Spice better for what it’s worth.

Full Moon Winter Ale is broadly in the style of a Belgian Dubbel. This is a tough style for a macro brewer to try. Most breweries producing Dubbels and other Abbey style beers are making good products. The use of American ingredients in a Belgian Abbey style beer results in a lackluster example that just can’t stand up to the best Dubbels on the market. Full Moon certainly isn’t as good as Blue Moon and I’d put the Harvest Moon slightly ahead as well.

Finally we have Leinenkugel, Leinenkugel was an independent family brewery years ago. However it was purchased by Miller, and has served as a partially independent craft beer line ever since.

These all run within a few tenths of 5% ABV. They may seem stronger, but they’re right in line with the full strength versions of Bud/Miller/Coors.

1888 Bock is very similar to the Michelob Amber Bock. Again, think Darker, sweeter American lager, not a German Bock.

Creamy Dark is another dark lager, but this one is based more along the lines of a German Dunkel than a Bock.

Sunset Wheat is a lot like Blue Moon, but it has blueberry flavor added instead of orange.

Classic Amber is like a lighter, not as tasty Sam Adams Boston Lager.

Red is broadly in the style of a Vienna lager. Closer to the Mexican versions of the style than the craft beer versions.

Fireside Nut Brown is the winter seasonal. It’s a brown ale with hazelnut flavoring added. To me the flavoring is too much.

There are more than just these six, but most of the rest are various versions of flavored wheat beers (honey, berry etc..).

So there you go, Bud American Ale and most of the Michelob products – treats. Most of the rest – tricks. With the Leiny products somewhere in neutral territory.